The (not really) gory details, and a bit of history

So, back in October of 2006 I was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma, left side, very very early (3 places but only 2mm, 3mm, & 4mm.) I underwent a lumpectomy followed by 7 weeks of radiation therapy and that was that. Nothing found on the sentinel node biopsy, and the form of cancer cell was "tubular" - I kid you not. Turns out it's kind of rare and the least aggressive type it can be.

As a matter of course, there's been one test or another every 6 months. In summer 2008, one false alarm, confirmed false by a surgical biopsy. All quiet on the Western front (so to speak)until my latest MRI, and then a little something was spotted, which was followed up by a fine needle aspiration one week ago. Turns out you get the results of that kind of test immediately, so as I stood there (without Rod as he was still in the waiting room) they told me it "wasn't good" and looked very sad. Not helpful behavior on their part, really. I don't expect saccharine smiles and such, but for heaven's sake, it would have been nice to start up with some "let's work on getting this thing taken care of" kind of talk.

From there Rod and I whisked ourselves over to Dr. McIntosh's office (in the hospital itself) where her nurse Pat met us and sympathized. Left the hospital a little shell-shocked and shaken. It didn't take much to drag up some emotion for singing during the Yom HaShoah program the next night :\

Dr. M. called me later that day to say it was indeed, invasive ductal carcinoma but the size this time was about 1 cm around. Not huge but compared to the last ones, still big, to me at least. She had only a verbal report from pathology, but told me to call her office Monday to make an appointment to talk.

Tuesday at 4:45 promptly Rod & I sat with her until almost 6 while she explained what she thought we should do next. And so we did:

Speed walk to the elevators, down to the basement of the main building to get a blood test - some to be mailed to Calif. for a genetic test and some to stay to test for cancer antibodies (or something like that,) then charge across to the other building to go up to the third floor for a chest xray.

By then it's almost 7 p.m. and I'm anxious to get to the synagogue meeting that starts at 7:30. Despite my dad's warning almost 10 years ago, I do enjoy working behind the scenes at synagogue "politics."

Can I tell you something? The people who work after hours at Englewood Hospital are some of the nicest I've ever met. The phlebotomy guy (drawer of blood)lovely despite the fact he's stuck in the basement of the oldest part of the building. Solicitous, unhurried - the x-ray guy even offered coffee. I felt bad saying no (because by then we wanted to get the heck out of the hospital!)

All this week I've been avoiding called to get the results because frankly I was so sick of bad news I didn't want to ask for any more. The not sleeping set in. Dr. M. called in a prescription for Ambien CR (I've taken it before and I did send an email without realizing it - remember, Elyssa? - and I'll be careful.)

Finally today Rod (my knight in shining armor and a rock and my hero) called them and turns out they had the X-ray, which was clear, and blood test results and everything from that end was normal.

For those in the know, or those with spouses in the know: the CA 27.29 is listed as "in range" at 14 with a reference range of <38 U/mL. I think that means the normal consideration is anything under 38, and mine's 14. So, if the number is low it means the little antibodies aren't out in quantity to fight cancer - am I even close?

Only a sentinel node biopsy will tell for sure if even one cancer cell has leaked out of where they started into the lymph system, but you can't know that until whichever surgery is in my future. For now, though, sitting tight. (Wish I could find out if this one is "tubular" - it would be nice - but for some reason they don't have that information, or I just didn't ask the right person/question.)

Many of you already know most of this, and to you I say, thanks for being a huge part of how I was able to deal with it the last time around. For everyone else, welcome to my head. It's a rather disorganized place but I try to keep it homey with squishy throw pillows and a nice soft rug. Books and computers are everywhere, of course, since all modern folk know these items are NOT mutually exclusive.

Next entry, something more uplifting like the distractions - Facebook Scrabble (want to play?), the chinchilla baby boys who live in a cage three feet from my favorite chair, and my renewed obsession with jigsaw puzzles (they are clearly some kind of therapy!)

For now, listening to the Red Sox win one, maybe, and waiting to go back out at 11 p.m. to pick up Ari from his friend's sweet 16 party. Tonight we took Alex out to dinner to celebrate his being elected as president of the Montclair State University Gamers - a Student Government Association - funded and sanctioned club on campus, like fraternities but just a little geekier:) Life goes on, ya know?